In the talk show "Round Table", the writer Jiang Fangzhou shared one thing from her childhood: as a captain when she was a child, one task was to check the red scarf at the gate of the school, and deduct two points if she did not wear a red scarf. So I can always see a child crying at the gate of the school. It's a big deal from an adult's point of view, but it's not a trivial matter for children. This is also a confusion for many parents: why are children becoming more arrogant? What's the matter?
However, the fact is that the deduction is insignificant in the eyes of an adult, but for the child, the deduction of these two points means that he may be ridiculed by his classmates, criticized by the teacher, and collectively rejected. Shame and fear. There is a sentence in "The Little Prince": "All adults were children, although only a few people remember." When we were young, we had restlessness before the test results were announced, and we were at the teacher's office. The front was disturbed, but as adults, we easily forgot those feelings, and we urged our children to strive hard. No wonder the child would say: You don't understand me at all!
At present, some variety shows of Zhenghuo focus on children, let us re-experience the feeling of being a child, and also remind us: the world of children is not easy.
Children also have self-esteem
In the variety show "Juvenile Talk", a high school girl yelled at her mother under the stage, hoping that her mother could close the door to educate herself, and don't always lose her temper in front of outsiders.
Mom didn't think so. She asked her child, "Whether it's important for the mother's face or the child's face to be outside?" Parents want their children to earn face for themselves, but they always ignore the child's face, and always educate the child regardless of the occasion, regardless of the occasion. The child's inner feelings damage and frustrate the child's self-esteem. They even complain that their children have too much self-esteem, that they have a thin face and that they care about others' views too much. Children are often deeply hurt by adults and cannot lift their heads in front of others.
There is a saying in Jimmy's comic "My fault is an adult's fault": "A child would rather be stabbed by a cactus than hear an adult's cynicism."
Nothing is too good, so is self-esteem. Evaluating yourself too low will lead to low self-esteem, and conversely, it is easy to be arrogant and hide a sensitive and fragile heart. A psychologist once used a balloon as a metaphor for children's self-esteem: "A balloon with no gas is worthless, but it is easy to burst if the gas is too full; It will be both ornamental and safe. "Children must be criticized for making mistakes, but they must pay attention to the occasion and not the right thing. Children should be praised for their good performance, but don't use the words "you are smart" or "you are awesome", but praise the children's efforts and efforts. Correct compliments and criticisms can make children's self-esteem develop healthily. Of course, the most important thing is the unconditional love of parents.